


I can't lose you too

by Thomasnewtminho29



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Demons AU, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, demons spoilers, jasper and monty are in love, red sky at morning AU, they comfort each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-23
Updated: 2016-05-07
Packaged: 2018-06-04 00:00:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6632320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thomasnewtminho29/pseuds/Thomasnewtminho29
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jasper's all Monty has left and Monty realises that he can't lose the person he loves.</p><p>(Some missing scenes from Demons with a reworked ending)</p><p>CHAPTER 2: set after 'Red Sky at Morning'- Jasper helps Monty grieve.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> That episode made me so mad. Jasper tried to reach out to Monty and Monty just turned away! This is basically what went on in the airlock from Monty's point of view with Monty and Jasper making up afterwards. I just needed to fix it. This might continue as a jonty au of all the future episodes depending on what happens.

The first thing Monty was aware of was that someone was dragging him across the floor. His throat was dry and his head was fuzzy as he struggled to remember what had happened. He’d been with Clarke. They’d been attacked.

 

His eyes flew open and he tilted his head to look at his attacker. His heart skipped a beat when he saw the man’s face. _Emerson._ The former Mount Weather guard looked down at Monty and flashed him a terrifying grin.

 

“Where are you taking me?” Monty rasped. Emerson didn’t reply as he yanked Monty upright and shoved him into the airlock. Monty raised his head and met Miller’s gaze. Monty’s stomach jolted as he saw Bryan and Harper nearby all chained up. He looked to the other side of the airlock and saw Octavia. Her eyes were wide and she was shaking her head. Monty’s eyes travelled down and he froze.

 

Jasper was slumped unconscious against the wall with blood running down his face. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM?” Monty shouted as he struggled to break free from Emerson’s hold.

 

“Shut up” Emerson grunted as he threw Monty down next to Bryan and snapped some handcuffs round his wrists.

 

“Please” Monty begged. “Let me go to him. I need to know that he’s ok.”

 

Emerson crouched down in front of him. “I want you all to suffer as much as possible” he explained. “If I can make you suffer by not letting you get to your boyfriend then so be it.”

 

Monty’s eyes pricked with tears but he refused to let them fall. He held his head high and fixed Emerson with a cold glare.

 

The radio suddenly crackled into life and Emerson hurried over to it as Bellamy started speaking.

 

_“Raven, are you ok? Where you?”_

_“Still in engineering, we’re fine.”_

_“Raven, listen to me. Emerson is here. Are the others with you?”_

_“Negative. Just Sinclair. Mount Weather Emerson?”_

_“Yes. Look lock down the hanger bay-”_

Emerson shut off the radio and laughed. “I’ll be back soon with the rest of your friends” he said. The doors to the airlock opened and Emerson stepped outside and the doors closed behind him.

 

Monty started struggling against the chains. “It’s no use” Octavia said, her voice dull. “We can’t get free.”

 

“I need to get to Jasper” Monty said desperately. His heart was beating too fast and his hands were shaking. He yanked himself forward once more and then slumped back with a yell. “I can’t lose him” he choked out. “I just can’t.”

 

Bryan shuffled towards him as much as he could so that his shoulder was resting against Monty’s. “Jasper will be ok” Bryan soothed. “We all will.”

 

Monty sniffed and blinked rapidly to stop his tears from falling. “You don’t know that.”

 

Bryan nudged his shoulder before glancing up at Miller. Monty could tell that Bryan was aching to be able to hug his boyfriend. “You’ve just got to try and believe it.”

 

Monty nodded and closed his eyes focusing on just breathing in and out. After a few minutes he heard a moan and he opened his eyes and jerked forward, his heart pounding.

 

Jasper was squinting against the light. “Ouch” he murmured. “What happened?”

 

“Emerson happened” Octavia said. “He’s got us all locked up. I think it’s some kind of revenge for Mount Weather. He’s gone to find Raven, Sinclair, Bellamy and Clarke.”

 

“Jasper” Monty said urgently. “Are you ok?”

 

Jasper struggled to sit up properly, his eyes widening when he saw Monty. He looked terrified. He opened his mouth to speak just as the doors opened and Emerson came through with Raven.

 

Despite being in obvious pain, Raven was trying as hard as she could to kick Emerson. “You bastard” she sobbed. “You killed him. He’s never done anything to you and you just killed him.”

 

“You all did something to me” Emerson growled as he chained Raven to the wall next to Jasper.

 

Raven turned her tearstained face to look at Monty. “He killed Sinclair” she said. Monty felt sick. Sinclair had been his mentor, the reason he was an engineer and now he was gone. He couldn’t lose _anyone_ else.

 

Emerson was walking around the room, stuffing pieces of cloth into everyone’s mouths to gag them. “I have no doubt that your fearless leaders will be here soon” he sneered. “They’re going to watch you all die before I kill them too.” Miller and Octavia both started struggling and lashing out while Emerson laughed at their efforts. The radio crackled once again and Clarke’s voice filled the room.

 

“ _Emerson? I know you’re listening. We need to talk”_

Emerson smiled. “I don’t need to do anything. You should have killed me when you had the chance.” Monty shared a glance with Raven. Clarke had passed on an opportunity to kill Emerson?

 

“ _And now you’re here to kill me. Is that it?”_

 

Emerson smirked. “Something like that.”

 

_“Then let my friends go. Do that and you can have me.”_

 

“You’re brave Clarke, I’ll give you that. They’re lucky to have a friend like you.” Emerson looked around the room, a triumphant grin spreading across his face. Monty realised with a sickening jolt that this was exactly what Emerson wanted. “Come to the airlock” Emerson said. “No weapons. Right now.” He shut off the radio and walked through the airlock. “I hope you’re all ready to say goodbye” he said.

 

Monty looked at Jasper. His friend’s eyes were filled with tears but he kept his gaze locked with Monty’s. There was so much that Monty needed to say to Jasper. He couldn’t let Jasper or himself die without sorting everything out.

 

He heard footsteps and turned his head to see Clarke walking down the corridor towards the airlock. “I held up my part of the deal” she said. “Your turn. Let my friends go.”

 

“Tell Bellamy to show himself first.” Emerson said.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talk-” Clarke started to say before Emerson suddenly punched Octavia. Monty struggled against his chains again as Octavia cried out.

 

Bellamy ran around the corner and Emerson held a knife to Octavia’s throat. Monty could barely breathe. “Take out the clip” Emerson said. “Throw it down the hall. Put the gun on the ground and get inside.”

 

Monty watched as Bellamy did what he was told and walked towards the airlock. Monty’s heart fell. He didn’t know if there was a way out now. Bellamy locked the handcuffs around his wrists and Emerson pointed a gun towards Clarke. “Get on your knees Clarke” he told her. “Put your hands behind your head.” Emerson walked out of the airlock and shut the doors behind him. He yanked Clarke up off the ground and pushed her towards the airlock doors.

 

Monty looked back towards Jasper just as Emerson pressed the button which would zap the oxygen from the room. Monty could feel his chest tightening and his throat closing. He stared at Jasper and desperately tried to use his eyes to tell Jasper how much he loved him and that he was sorry and that he forgave him. He could hear his friends gasping for air and he watched as tears rolled down Jasper’s face as he tried to mouth something. There were black spots dancing across Monty’s vision and he was struggling to breathe. His last thought was of how Jasper would never know how much he loved him.

 

Then suddenly Monty could breathe again. He tried to take a big gulp of air around his gag and slowly opened his eyes. Clarke had crawled across the floor towards Raven and had removed her gag. “No” Raven gasped as Clarke moved to unlock her handcuffs. “Do Monty first.” Monty looked at Raven gratefully. Clarke looked confused but she slowly pulled herself upright and walked over to Monty.

 

“Thank you” Monty croaked after Clarke had released him. He stumbled over to Jasper, removing his gag and handcuffs before pulling him into his arms and running his hands over his friend’s face. _‘He’s alive’_ he thought. _‘Thank god he’s alive.’_

 

“Are you ok?” he asked, his voice catching as Jasper looked up at him.

 

Jasper nodded. “I’m ok” he said softly. “Are you?”

 

Monty shook his head before bursting into tears, the events of the last hour or so overwhelming him. Jasper sat up properly and wrapped his arms tightly around Monty, pulling him to his chest. Monty sobbed into Jasper’s shirt as Jasper rubbed his back and pressed his lips to Monty’s hair. He could hear the others leaving and Jasper assuring them that they’d be ok. They just needed a bit of time to process everything.

 

Eventually Monty sat up sniffling slightly and wiped his eyes. Jasper wrapped an arm round his shoulders and Monty leant against him with a sigh. “Feel better?” Jasper asked.

 

“A bit” Monty whispered. “It’s just- I really thought I’d lost you and that we’d both die without sorting anything out and I would have never told you that I-” he trailed off, mentally kicking himself. He’d nearly admitted his feelings for Jasper without even knowing if Jasper truly forgave him for everything that had happened.

 

“You would have never told me that you what?” Jasper asked. Monty thought he almost sounded nervous.

 

“It doesn’t matter” Monty muttered, pulling away from Jasper.

 

“It does matter” Jasper argued. “Especially if you were going to tell me what I’ve been wanting to tell you.”

 

Monty looked up at Jasper and was amazed by the look of pure love in his eyes. “And what would that be?” he whispered.

 

Jasper leaned forward and kissed him. Monty kissed him back without even hesitating. The kiss was desperate and passionate and at one point Monty was pretty sure that his heart was going to burst. When they broke apart Monty was breathless. He rested his forehead against Jasper’s and tried to breathe deeply.

 

“I wanted to tell you that I love you” Jasper said, a smile spreading across his face.

 

“So did I” Monty replied. “I love you too.” He stomach twisted as he thought about Mount Weather and Pike and his mother and he sat back and turned away from Jasper slightly.

 

“What is it?” Jasper asked gently.

 

“I don’t even know who I am anymore” Monty admitted in a small voice.

 

Jasper gently turned Monty back around to face him and brushed Monty’s hair out of his eyes. “That’s ok” he said. “I know who you are. You’re Monty Green. You’re a genius. You’re one of the best engineers in the entire universe. You’re ridiculously brave- you helped me blow up that bridge for a start! You tried to take all the blame for stealing the herbs on the Ark. You’re my best friend. You’re my soulmate.” He cupped Monty’s cheek. “You don’t have to be alone anymore.”

 

Monty blushed and his eyes filled with tears again. He didn’t think he could speak.

 

“I haven’t been in a good place” Jasper continued. “But I’m going to make it up to you, if it’s not too late. Thinking that Emerson was going to hurt you and then watching you nearly die… I couldn’t cope. I can’t lose you.”

 

“You’re all I have left” Monty told him. “We can learn to forgive each other. The past few weeks, especially today, have taught me that life’s too short. I don’t want to waste another second not loving you.”

 

Jasper smiled as Bellamy’s voice came over the radio. “ _Are you two ok? We wanted to have a funeral for Lincoln and Sinclair before we leave if you’re up for it?”_

 

Monty and Jasper looked at each other sadly. In all the chaos Monty had almost forgotten that his mentor was dead. Jasper picked up the radio. “We’re ok” he replied. “We’ll be there in a minute.”

 

 _“Good”_ Bellamy said, sounding relieved. _“Monty, Raven wants to see you in engineering before we start.”_

 

“I’m on my way” Monty said. He jumped up and grabbed Jasper’s hand to pull him up smiling slightly as Jasper laced their fingers together. “Let’s go” Monty said, the darkness that had been weighing him down lifted slightly as he walked away with Jasper.

 

*************************************************************************

 

Raven had a plan. Monty thought it showed how brilliant Raven’s mind was and he was honoured that she thought he was clever enough to help. They stood and explained to Bellamy and Clarke that they were going to stay in Arkadia and Monty was relieved when Miller, Bryan and Harper agreed to stay with them.

 

“What about you Jasper?” Bellamy asked. “It’s going to be dangerous.”

 

“You know me well” Jasper joked. “I’m in.”

 

Monty’s heart ached a little. He’d only just got Jasper back and they were going to be separated again. As everyone said their goodbyes, Jasper walked over to Monty and wrapped his arms round his waist. “You and Raven are going to sort this” he said firmly. “I believe in you. But I need to do something that makes me feel useful so I need to go with Bellamy and Clarke.”

 

Monty nodded and looped his arms around Jasper's neck. “I’m proud of you” he told him.

 

Jasper kissed him and Monty melted in his arms. “I’ll be back soon” Jasper murmured against Monty’s lips. “I promise.”

 

Monty pulled back slightly, instantly regretting the loss of warmth. “You better” he tried to joke but his voice shook.

 

Jasper turned to hug Raven. “Look after my boy for me” he said.

 

“I will” Raven smiled. “You just focus on looking after yourself.”

 

Jasper kissed Monty once more before he stepped back and walked to the Rover. He jumped in and looked back at Monty. “I love you Monty” he said.

 

Monty smiled. “I love you too” he replied.

 

Jasper shut the door and Bellamy drove the Rover out of the hanger. Monty watched it drive out of the gates as Raven placed her hand on his back.

 

Jasper would be back. Nothing in the world could keep him and Monty apart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set after 'Red Sky at Morning' Jasper helps Monty grieve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've come back as promised to deliver an au after THAT episode. Basically everything from the episode is the same but there's no Harper/Monty sex and Jasper and Shay didn't flirt. (They just talked about space and the oil rig and Jasper told her how adorable Monty is)
> 
> I hope you enjoy it. I hope jonty are reunited next week!

Monty sat in one of the unused rooms in Arkadia with his knees pulled to his chest trying not to cry. He’d trusted Raven. He’d really believed that she’d be able to shut ALIE down. He’d even deleted his mother’s code but they’d been too slow. ALIE was still in charge and Monty’s mum was gone forever.

 

Monty choked out a sob and wished that Jasper was with him. All he wanted was for Jasper to hug him and kiss him and tell his that everything would be ok. Jasper and the others still hadn’t returned from finding Luna though so Monty was alone with his dark thoughts and self-loathing.

 

He heard a quiet knock at the door and looked up to see Harper standing in the doorway looking concerned. “Hey” she said gently. “Do you need anything?”

 

Monty sniffed. “I need Jasper.”

 

“I’m sure he’ll be back soon” Harper soothed as she took a couple of steps into the room. “Monty… Raven told me what happened. If you want to talk-”

 

“I don’t” Monty interrupted. “I’m sorry Harper, I know you’re trying to look out for me but I just want to be alone.”

 

Harper sighed. “Ok” she whispered. “But you shouldn’t bottle everything up Monty. Even if you’re not ready to talk to Raven yet, I’m still here. So are Miller and Bryan.” She cleared her throat. “After Monroe died I wasn’t sure if I could talk to anyone. Everyone was split up but Miller listened to me and it really helped.

 

The ache in Monty’s chest grew when he thought about Monroe. Another person he couldn’t save. “I won’t bottle it up” Monty promised. “Thank you. I will talk to you, it’s just too raw right now.”

 

Harper nodded in understanding and gave Monty a small smile before leaving the room. As soon as Harper has left, Monty rested his forehead on his knees taking deep breaths. He knew that he shouldn’t have shouted at Raven. He hadn’t meant to make her cry and he really shouldn’t have shoved that stupid chip at her but he was so hurt. If only Raven had listened to him then his mum would still be in the city of light. God he missed his mum.

 

 _‘Please forgive me’_ Monty thought. _‘I’m so sorry.’_

 

He heard a commotion outside and then Bellamy’s voice asking if everyone was ok. He could hear Miller’s deep voice and then Raven crying. Monty hugged his knees and tried to make himself as small as possible. He heard footsteps hurrying towards the room and then…

 

“Mont?”

 

Monty crumbled at the sound of his boyfriend’s voice. His body shook with sobs and tears streamed down his face. He felt Jasper’s arms around him and he turned so his face was pressed against Jasper’s neck.

 

“It’s ok” Jasper murmured. “I’ve got you, everything’s going to be ok. Just breathe.”

 

“I-I can’t” Monty cried. “She’s gone. It’s all my fault.”

 

He felt Jasper kiss the top of his head and stroke his hair. “It’s not your fault” Jasper said quietly. “None of this is your fault. You were trying to save everyone. You sacrificed your mum’s code for all of us. You’re the bravest person I know Monty. I love you.”

 

Monty stayed curled up in Jasper’s arms until his tears slowed and his sobs turned to gentle hiccups. “It’s not Raven’s fault either” Jasper said. “ALIE is the one who’s manipulated everyone. Raven was trying to do what was best just like you.”

 

Monty sat up and wiped his eyes, sniffling quietly. “I know” he whispered. “It’s just- I hoped I could get my mum back somehow and now she’s really gone and it was all for nothing.”

 

Jasper gently kissed Monty’s cheek. “I’m so sorry” he murmured. “I’d do anything to take your pain away.”

 

Monty rested his head against Jasper’s shoulder. “Just having you here is enough” he sighed. “I love you.” He looked up at Jasper and did a double take as he saw his boyfriend’s face properly. “Oh my god” he breathed, his hand coming up to gently touch the cuts and bruises scattered over Jasper’s face. “What the hell happened?”

 

Jasper ducked his head. “ALIE found us” he said his voice cracking. “Some of her people locked the others up but they caught me and tied me up” he shuddered and Monty squeezed him tightly. Jasper kissed his forehead before continuing, “They tried to force me to take the chip.” Monty’s heart skipped a beat. “It’s ok” Jasper said quickly, noticing Monty’s expression. “I didn’t take it. I’m still me.”

 

“Good” Monty said. He tilted his head up and kissed Jasper, chasing away the darkness and focusing on the warmth that he felt whenever Jasper was around. It scared him that Jasper had been close to death again. He never wanted to let him go. When they broke apart Jasper rested his forehead against Monty’s and sighed as he twisted a lock of Monty’s hair around his finger.

 

“You should have seen this place Mont” he said wistfully. “It was an oil rig in the middle of the sea! When we got there, before it all went to shit, everyone was so peaceful and happy. It was like they’d never known any war or sadness.” Monty thought it sounded surreal. It seemed like they’d been fighting war after war for years. “There was this girl” Jasper continued, “Shay. She’d never left the rig and I thought- imagine if there hadn’t been an oxygen problem on the Ark and we hadn’t been arrested. Imagine how happy we’d be?”

 

Monty tried to imagine lying in his bedroom with Jasper by his side and his parents in the next room. Happy and alive but trapped forever in Space. “We would have always felt like there was something missing” he said. “We’ve dreamt about Earth since we were 5.”

 

Jasper sighed again. “I know. I just want us to be happy.”

 

“We will be one day” Monty said and he was trying his hardest to believe it. “What happened to Shay? Is she alright?”

 

Jasper’s face darkened and Monty’s stomach twisted. “She’s dead” he said bitterly. “That’s what we do, we ruin things.”

 

“I’m sorry” Monty said. Pain really did seem to follow them where ever they went. “God I wish we could just save everyone.”

 

They sat in silence for a few minutes and then Monty spoke again. “So I guess Luna didn’t take the flame.”

 

Jasper shook his head. “She has no desire to become the next Commander. Can’t say I blame her.”

 

Monty tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling. “What are we going to do” he said, his voice barely more than a whisper.

 

Jasper reached for his hand and intertwined their fingers. “Clarke says she has an idea. She wanted to wait until we were all together but it can wait if you need more time.”

 

“I’m ok” Monty said. “There will be time to grieve later when we’ve destroyed ALIE.”

 

He went to stand up but Jasper squeezed his hand and Monty turned his head to look at him. He didn’t think he’d ever seen Jasper look this serious. “I’m here if it gets too much” Jasper said. “Please talk to me if you need to. I don’t want you to end up like me.”

 

Monty hadn’t thought that he could love Jasper any more than he already did but his heart swelled with love at Jasper’s words. He pulled Jasper to his feet and kissed him sweetly. When they broke apart Monty traced Jasper’s jawline with his thumb. “The same goes for you” he said softly.

 

They walked out of the room together and were met by their friends. Monty’s heart somersaulted when he saw Raven. Her eyes were swollen and she looked devastated. “I’m so sorry Monty” she sniffed. “If I’d known she’d shut down the system I would never have gone in. I never wanted you to lose your mum.”

 

Monty stepped forward and hugged Raven tightly. “It wasn’t your fault” he mumbled against her shoulder. “ _I’m_ sorry. I shouldn’t have shouted at you and I definitely shouldn’t have accused you of wanting to take the chip.”

 

Raven’s arms tightened around him before she pulled away. “Let’s bring this bitch down” she said. Monty managed a small smile as they both turned to face Clarke.

 

“What’s the plan?” Monty asked. Jasper moved to stand next to him and wrapped his arm round his waist. Monty leant against him and looked at his friends. They were together again. They could do this.

 

Clarke glanced around the group, her expression determined. She said four words.

 

“King Roan of Azgeda.”


End file.
